Post by irobin on Jun 13, 2011 16:10:49 GMT -5
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Monday, June 13th, 2001.
02:12 (A few hours after Retribution has ended)
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“How many more times am I going to sit here, Jace?”
May’s voice was quiet, barely disturbing the dark and the silence of the room, her face illuminated by a thin crack of moonlight peering through the room’s curtains.
“Once was enough, now we’re here again. I don’t know if I’ll be able to sit here a third time.”
May sniffled, her eyes were puffy and red, but showed no sign of tears yet. She was sat on a chair, dressed casually, a thin cardigan wrapped around her small frame as she stared at the body lying in the bed next to her. After Jace’s submission match with Warrior, she had escorted him on his trip to the hospital and the whole thing brought back painful memories of the after-events of Back 2 Roots, only two months prior. May shivered, it was an unseasonably cold night and the hospital had not adjusted the heating to accommodate it. Jace was not seriously injured and things were not nearly as bad as they had been the first time, but this seemed like small comfort to May as she fought back against the tears that hung in the corners of her eyes.
Jace had been brought here as a precaution, he had been examined and given some very strong painkillers, along with a tranquiliser to help him sleep. His body was twisted and stretched, but not broken, and he would recover, but he would need time to rest. His knee was in no fit state, and it would be at least four weeks before he could even consider a return to the ring.
The problem was that May knew that he would return after four weeks. Once he was cleared, he would go back in the ring. He hadn’t fully recovered from Back 2 Roots when he set foot in the ring with Warrior at Retribution, and if he kept this up, how long would it be until he got seriously injured? Or perhaps even killed? If he kept going after Warrior, it seemed like it could only be a matter of time before Jace got himself into a really bad situation.
“I just don’t get it, Jason. Why does it matter?”
May gazed up at the moon, peeking through the gap in the curtains.
“Why do you need to win? Why do you need to beat Warrior? Why do I have this terrible feeling in my gut that you’ll come back and go after Warrior again? Can’t you just… Walk away? I don’t know why you got into wrestling, Jace, but I know how you can get out of it. It’s easy, you just have to walk away. I’m sure that Kirk, or Mark or whoever is in charge will let you go and then you can do something else.”
May sniffled again, her gaze returning to watch Jace sleeping in the sterile white of the hospital bed. He was silent and peaceful, but May was a nurse, she had seen the charts, the x-rays, she had spoken with the hospital staff. She alone knew just how bad Jace’s body was. He might as well be made of glass. After all, Jace was a model, his muscles were real, but they were for show, his body wasn’t trained for this sort of punishment. Even winning almost killed Jace and his training was no less intense. He needed to relax, or his career would end far sooner than anyone expected.
His career, if he was lucky.
“I’ve seen the letters, Jace. I’ve taken a few calls when you’ve been out in the gym, being a wrestler has made you famous again. Retire and make movies, or host a talk show, or something like that. I’ve even seen that one you keep hidden in your duffel bag, about being a judge on America’s Next Top Model… Why can’t you do that? You don’t know when to quit, do you?”
May’s eyes began to water again as she quietly whispered into the dark, pulling her knees up against her chest, her toes curling around the edge of the seat as she huddled for warmth in the cold of the night. Fighting back the tears, she sniffled.
“That’s why I had to do it. I had to quit for you, because we both know you wouldn’t, and maybe you would have turned it around and won, but maybe you wouldn’t. What if I hadn’t thrown in the towel for you? Would Warrior have broken you? Would he have killed you, Jason? Is your pride truly so great that you would rather die than give up?”
May swallowed hard, holding back the tears.
“They talk of heroes that would rather die than give up… Is that you? Are you so determined to prove yourself to the fans that you would rather die in the ring than admit defeat?”
Staring up into the moon once more, May’s eyes are glossy and full of tears, but so far, none have spread to her cheeks yet as she gazes into the great white moon.
“Is that why we met, Jason? Am I meant to save you? If your pride is so great then it is clearly your downfall, and I’ll have to do what I can to stop it being your end, too. I know you’re not happy about what I did, and I hope you can forgive me, but if you force me to, I’ll do it again because someone has to.”
May sniffles, she pulls a handkerchief from her pocket and holds it to her nose for a few seconds, before looking at it. It’s the same handkerchief from the match and, as May stares into the soft, white cotton, her eyes well up once more until the tears are more than she can hold back and the fall like a wave overcoming a dam, running in steady streams down her cheeks, dripping onto her knees, and the tissue, patches of white quickly turning dark with moisture.
“Damn you, Jason Ambrose. Damn you! Why can’t you see that this isn’t just about you? When you get hurt, I get hurt too. You don’t realise it, but we’re a couple now. We’re not just going on a casual date, or hanging out, we’re a couple. I pretty much live with you now, when you head off on a road trip to the show, I go with you. When you win, I celebrate with you and share your joy… When you lose, though, when you lose… I’m alone.”
May squeaks out the last few words, hugging her knees tighter to her chest, her eyes closed, her body hunched, she looked like a small child, alone and frightened.
“I’m the one that sits in these dark, unfeeling hospitals, crying into the small hours of the morning, sobbing until I exhaust myself enough to sleep. You don’t see it, because you’re already sleeping, so maybe you don’t realise what you’re doing, but when you lose, and the pain that you feel? I feel it too. I wince each time you’re struck, I squirm each time you’re put in a submission, and I feel the air forced from me each time you get clattered. As long as you continue to wrestle, I know that this will continue, and I know you won’t see it. I know you need me to be strong; you need me to tell you that you’re my champion, and that you’ll be Mr. Amazing. Those aren’t lies, but I get scared sometimes. You can’t win every match, and for some reason, Jason, when you lose, it’s always like this. You can’t just stay down for a three count, or tap out in a hopeless situation. Maybe that’s noble, but really, I think it’s stupid.”
May sniffles, her brow furrowing as she stares at the bed where Jace is soundly sleeping.
“I think it’s stupid and ridiculous and irresponsible. You don’t care about your own body; you only care about your own damned pride. Do you even care about me? I’m not always sure that you do. So I say that pride be damned, Jason, you can’t do this forever. You’re not a fighter like Toby Hunter, or a hero like Dante Holly. You aren’t even the ultimate opportunist like Mr. Luck, you’re just Jason Ambrose. You’re not a wrestler; you’re just a man trying. And trying so very hard, with no visible results. Maybe that’s a blessing. If you won a title, things might only become worse. Thank God you had the sense not to get involved in the HardKore division, but you don’t seem to realise that you can get just as badly beaten by a man without a steel chair in his hand. These guys are professionals; most have been doing it all their lives… They are weapons.”
May stands up and approaches the bed, taking one of Jace's hands and holding it against her chest, her tears dropping onto it.
“You need to know when to quit, and that applies to wrestling, too. I love you, Jason, I will always love you, but I cannot sit by and spend my life watching you get demolished. Even when you win, you end up in a worse state than your opponents; your body can’t take it any more and neither can I. Please, give it up, for my sake.”
May sniffles, wiping her eyes with the handkerchief once more as she sits back down, staring at the floor.
“I know you can’t hear me, but I’ll never be able to tell you myself. You’re so passionate, so proud, so determined to be the best… In truth, it’s a lot of why I fell for you in the first place, but I cannot do this again. If we end up back here a third time, Jason, I hope you’ll have the sense to give it up. For good.”
“I promise.”
May blinks, looking up, she sees Jace has his back to her, but his voice is unmistakable.
“I promise, May. Three strikes and I’m out… This is number two.”
May’s eyes well up once more as she sobs uncontrollably, but this time, her face looks different, because, for the first time tonight, a slightly smile is tugging at the corner of her lips.
“Thank you.”
Jace nodded, even through the medication, he could feel the throbbing of his knee. May was right, he needed to know when to admit defeat and walk away. For his sake, but also for hers…