icanhaz sekrit originz?

[Mr. C]

Young Daniel Halloway was a fun loving child with a brilliant mind and a wonderful sense of humor. He was like any other kid, yet he was always just a little to interested in his two loves: super heroes and wrestling, and at times this perhaps caused him to come on a little too strong. Be it his ADHD or his source of role models, he was a kid who meant well, but always seemed to rub people the wrong way. After struggling to adapt to the culture that could not find the patience for him, Daniel snapped and turned away from the world only to return later as a man that would stand up for those who were made a mockery of. The child some people considered a nuisance, the world would later know as their savior. Born Daniel Halloway, but grown in to our Hero, The Defender of the Nubile, Dante Holly.

THE EUW PRESENTS: A VERY HOLLY CHRISTMAS SPECTACULAR!
WITH MUSIC BY KIRBY KRACKLE!

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(There will not be any actual mention of Christmas so as not to offend the members of the EUW that do not celebrate Christmas such as Brett Cross who instead celebrates Midvinter Solstice, Jack Bull who celebrates Kwanzaa, Fallen One who is an Atheist and in fact, Dante Holly who is Jewish (at least on Earth-616 continuity)!)

From birth, Daniel Halloway's destiny was pointed towards being somewhat of an outcast. His mother was the manager of some pretty famous wrestling superstars like "El Muerto" Juan-Carlos Estrada Sanchez, "Gator" Gavin Grant and Patches Chance, Esquire. And as for his father? Well, there's no explanation for how they were together, as he was the owner of a floundering comic store in downtown Hollywood called The Fortress of Solitude. At a young age, Daniel was diagnosed with ADHD and it put a pretty severe strain on family life, but the one thing that could always settle him down was watching wrestling and reading comic books - his two true loves.

Daniel loved comics, and his love for them was rivaled only by his love for wrestling. These over the top heroes, these tights-clad men performing acts normal humans could not. The sport, the excitement, the want to be them, it was the only thing that Halloway's mind could focus on. He spent many an afternoon running around in his dad's comic shop, a cape made out of a Wolverine beach towel tied around his neck, pretending to fly like Superman, weaving in and out of customers. Every year for Halloween, Holly would make his own costume to wear because "that's what real heroes did" and he would be so proud of it he'd wear it all day, including school. But at times, kids could be cruel to poor Daniel Halloway a kid who merely wanted to express his love for these heroes that stood up for the weak and the downtrodden, stood up for people like him, those who would never truly be One of the Guys.



Halloway was a small kid to begin with, and combined with his ADHD alone he would be a target, but his over-the-top infatuation with comics and wrestling made him the biggest target in the whole school, particularly for MacDonald "Mac" Gargan. When they first met back in first grade, the interaction did not go as Daniel thought it would.

"Your name is Mac Gargan?! Like The Scorpion who first appeared in Amazing Spider-Man #20?! Well, in truth, he first appeared as Mac Gargan in issue #19 as a private investigator sent to discover how Peter Parker could take such perfect shots of Spider-Man, but either way we can be best friends and I'll call you Scorpius because you remind me of The Scorpion!"

And Mac's only response was to punch him hard in the arm and leave poor Daniel with tears in his eyes. Mac was fed up with Halloway after only 13 seconds of interaction and their relationship only worsened over the years. Halloway continued to try and make friends with him throughout elementary school, but by the time they reached the fifth grade Daniel was far too immersed in comics and wrestling to ever be friends with Mac, who had turned in to the leader of a school yard gang called The Scorpions and he (ironically) adopted the namesake put upon him by his number one victim, becoming Scorpius.

Sadly, mild-mannered Daniel was never taught properly how to interact with people; as his dad was just as much of a nerd as him, and his mother was travelling all of the time. So, he quickly learned the way his dad did, by reading comics or watching wrestling, and these lessons were not the best for this impressionable youth. No matter how he tried, he was always the outcast. Perhaps it was his annoying habit of yelling in people's ears, his irrational fear of cats and the dark, or the fact that he could relate literally anything to comic books, but as he grew, he continued to grow away from his peers. He would spend his lunch periods sitting in the corner, his nose in the latest issue of Detective Comics, and as the depressing story of Holly's youth would have it, this only added rings to the bulls eye on his forehead. He suffered the usual bullying that others would, pushing, name-calling, his lunch was stolen on several occasions, but their favorite prank to pull on Holly was to put cats in his locker over night, so in the morning when Daniel went to put away his coat, a ferocious feline flew free from the locker and attacked him, NINJA STYLE.



The harassment continued to follow Daniel and with no help from his father who went through the same thing (yet had absolutely no advice other than to hide). It was by the time he turned 16 though that he decided he had enough after one final attack from a ninja kitty in his locker. Daniel dropped out at age 16 and resorted to spending all of his time in the Fortress of Solitude, working alongside his father, but at the same time, obsessing over creating his own persona, his own super hero that he could be - a way to defend those like himself, not a way to get revenge, but a way to protect. Call it a result of his motivations or his ADHD, but Daniel Halloway set out to become Dante Holly and establish his own persona as a defender, his own personal Secret Identity.



What originally was just a marketing tactic, a mascot for his father's store rapidly evolved in to something much more. Daniel Halloway was no longer a happy-go-lucky child, he had completely evolved in to the super hero, in to Hollywood's Hero, The Defender of the Nubile, Dante Holly. Under the shining symbol of a "D" in the night sky, Holly set out to rid the streets of crime, keeping the citizens safe and thwarting the plots of the evil Scorpius, who had paralleled Dante's path even outside of school.

In time, Dante Holly had become a household name in the state of California, and all was well for him - he had become just what he had deified for so long. But as every good hero knows, the world is full of just as many villains as saviors and Holly learned that for himself the hard way, having to defend Hollywood from the crazy cat-centered chaos of Scorpius on multiple occasions. Many times it involved simply punching him out, and then posing above him declaring "O' citizens of the Hollied Woods, your great city is safe once more!" And every time, Scorpius would find a way out of Arkham or The Raft or Lockdown 6 and return to the streets to set his purring plans in to action once again.



But one time in particular, Holly's heroism helped him greatly, and changed him from just a namesake in California to one known world-round. In another one of Scorpius' hair-balled schemes, he had captured Alan Christopher, one of the most famous names in wrestling, and with him he planned to create a life model cyborg of him controlled by the lolcats and then use his fame for his own world domination. But luckily for the world, the great Dante Holly was able to stop Scorpius before it was too late, punching him hard right in the mouth with a fantastic leaping punch from the rafters (because like every good villain he was using an abandoned warehouse on a dock). Then, after tying up the nefarious Scorpius and waiting for the cops to arrive, he realized just who it was he had saved.

"O' Alan Christ-Offer! I had not noticed it was you, as I was too busy thwarting the evil plots of your captor. But now that I have noticed who it is I have saved, I must tell you I am a huge fan and have watched you since I was a young card-carrying member of the Teen Titans!"

Pulling a Green Lantern wallet out from his utility belt, Holly flashed the cardboard ID badge laminated with scotch tape.

"Well Holly, I have to say, what you did was incredibly impressive. You have much more courage than I do, and I wrestle professionally. I'm a role model to a lot of kids, as I'm sure you know, but I'd just like to say that you are the real hero in this world, not me."

"O' Alan, may I call you Alan? I think that we are both heroes, as we give this nation's youth people to look up to! We show them right from wrong and light the path of truth and righteousness! Together, we are working to make this world safe from evil-doers like Scorpius! But I must ask a question Alan to prove that you are indeed the hero I suspect you to be... How do you prefer your juice?"

"In a box, of course! It's the only way to drink it!"

In unison the two heroes laughed heartily and put their arms over one another's shoulders and turned to walk towards the sunset.

"O' Alan Christ-Offer, I believe this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship."

And with that said, the two walked off, the sun setting behind the dock at their backs as the evil Scorpius was loaded in to the back of a SWAT car once again. From this new relationship, in time Holly acquired the path necessary to enter the world of professional wrestling and pursue both of his life-long dreams, while at the same time keeping the world safe from the evils that plague it - just like he'd always wanted to do.


And that's the Secret Origins of The EUW's resident Superhero, Dante Holly! Make sure to check the newsstands in one month for the next issue, Dante Holly #2 where The Defender of the Nubile teams up with... Captain Catnip?! Until next time, true believers!

Excelsior!

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Beckoning her forward, Sarah Thompson took the bait and leaned in, only to have her ear yelled in to in true Holly fashion.

"So! O' Nubile Sarah, female Son of Thoms, what think you of the comic of my secret origins?"

In real time, Holly sat beside Sarah, waiting impatiently on her opinion of the comic before her. Stapled in the top left corner he had illustrated the whole thing with a 50-pack of crayolas as he so kindly pointed out at the onset of the reading, and at appropriate times he hummed the tune to the music that was supposed to be playing. And through all of Holly's excitement, Sarah couldn't do much more than shake her head in amazement at Holly's antics, not sure at all how to reply.

"Well, uh, Dante Holly it was... very nice. I think you did a great job. But, I came in here to interview you on your match with Brett Cross, not read such a riveting story..."

Frowning inwardly, Holly stood from his chair, posing before her. One day, he hoped that he'd find the key to her heart, one day he hoped that he'd find a way to make her heart flutter like she did to his, to find that special Konami code. But for now, he'd just continue with his job.

"Oh, well, alright O' Sarah, female Son of Thoms, interview away!"


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