Post by dragon on Sept 9, 2010 1:40:34 GMT -5
If someone had told me that the last War Journal entry I ever would enter would come during the end of days.. I would have laughed in their face. I mean, I walked away from the business without a care in the world, sent packing first class style by my own damn brother.. Toby Hunter. Did I mention that he was my own brother?
Family is over-rated.
I can not tell you how many times I wished that a damn Fed-Ex truck would drive down his street, the driver not even staring at the road in front of him but instead gazing at the newest image of gay porn, only to run over Hunter’s self righteous ass. (Yes, I have truly planned that shit out.) How was I to know that within the next three months of my lovely retirement.. The game would change.
And so did the world as I knew it.
Family is over-rated.
I can not tell you how many times I wished that a damn Fed-Ex truck would drive down his street, the driver not even staring at the road in front of him but instead gazing at the newest image of gay porn, only to run over Hunter’s self righteous ass. (Yes, I have truly planned that shit out.) How was I to know that within the next three months of my lovely retirement.. The game would change.
And so did the world as I knew it.
It started with a shake. Not the kind of shake that Jack Bull would experience as he watched Titan’s mother strip on a sweat stained stage. I am talking a serious shake here. There I was, sitting on the damn toilet. (Things ALWAYS happens when you are on the toilet, doesn’t it?) I was leaning forward, trying to watch SNV on my bedroom television. My trousers were rumpled around my ankles as I dropped a couple of loads. Just as I caught a glimpse of Chris Sabora walking out unto the stage.. The program was suddenly cut off. I always said that Sabora would win his World Title back once the world came to an end.
I was right.
An image of some dude appeared on my screen. His posture was different than the average over paid reporter. No, this dude was obviously shaken up over whatever he was about to announce. Rising up off the “shitter“, I pull up my pants and get a better look…
| As of this morning, the United States of America has entered a World War. The state of New York has been attacked as of 11:00 am this morning by three Class A Nuclear Warheads. Immediately, shots were returned to the source as reports indicate the destruction of over 50% of England. I for one, hope for peace to be established quickly… for this could very well be the end. Other countries have taken up arms as well in the face of such a threat, and word has it.. Wait.. I am receiving reports that 5 more missiles have hit northern Russia now… |
Another quake hits my home hard once again, as I stare at the screen before me. Living out in the country, far away from civilization, a person tends to feel isolated at times. I could hardly believe what I was hearing. I would never have time to take it all in however..
Shutting off the television, I race across my home to get to the phone. (Yes Terry, you were fucking right about my house being unnecessarily large.) Grabbing the black receiver, I begin to punch in numbers. I had to find out more, but I never would. At least.. Not the easy way.
Pain. That word gets tossed around far too often. Some people say I am a pain in the ass. Looking back, I do not think they truly knew how powerful a word like pain truly is. I understand it though.. First hand.
Opening my eyes, I find myself lying upon my kitchen floor. Or at least what was once my kitchen floor. Looking around me, I quickly notice that I now own a rather large sun roof above my home. As a matter of fact, I don’t own a roof at all! Doing my best to lift my head up, I push away some of my furniture that had found it’s way on top of me. I can hear screams, and crying in the distance. You see, I have maybe 3 neighbors in the vicinity of my home. If I can hear screams… something is very wrong.
Rising to my feet, I wipe away some blood from my right thigh. My damn shirt is useless now, ripped away by whatever hit my home and landed on top of me. Removing my hair from my eyes, I step over a pile of bricks and walk through the newly formed hole in my wall. The sky around me is dark red, with not a cloud in sight. The ground shakes once again, as I stumble backwards unto my mail box. Irritated now, I rip the mail box out of it’s wooden base and toss it out into my front yard. Fuck that mail box. It never brought me good news anyway..
Stepping further into the front yard, I dig my underwear out of my ass. Instantly, I remember that I forgot to wipe it prior to the explosion. Here I am, in what looks to be Armageddon itself.. And I am forming a rash on my ass. Just great..
Hobbling over to my shed, I shake my head as I see it toppled over and on it’s side. I rip away the shingles and search through my scattered tools as I find what I am looking for. Removing my trusty sledge hammer, I give it a quick kiss and head back to my home. There is no sense in being unprepared. That was never my style.
Once inside the house, I switch on the television in hopes of getting any type of information. Of course.. It is dead. It’s back off to the yard once more as I open my truck door and power it up. After a few twists, the radio tells me all I need to know..
Sitting there, I remove my pack of cigs from my t-shirt. Lighting one up, I begin to puff on the dirty habit that I obtained during my retirement. Health was not really a concern to me any longer, especially under the circumstances. There was no telling what was going on in the world beyond one shitty news cast. Was I alone? How many survivors were left?
Looking over my shoulder, I listen as the cries from the house across the way continue. Laughing a bit, I remain seated and continue to enjoy my smoke. There was no way in hell that I was about to play hero to that bitch. The only contact I ever had with that neighbor that was enjoyable was when she brought me a home made pie to welcome me to the neighborhood upon moving in. It was a damn good pie too.. Until I developed the mud butt…
There would only be a limited amount of time until things got bad. I know what you are thinking, how could they be worse, right? Well, with no law or order.. It would not take long for shit to slip into a state of Anarchy. The thought of this excited me in a way, but not how it used to. Back in the day, I would have seen nothing but opportunity in this. Just the thought of an Xplode World Order would have had me shooting a hefty amount of splooge in all directions at one time. Sadly, I was starting to show my age. All of those years in the ring, the constant damage I inflicted upon my limbs, had left me a bit rough around the edges. Sure, I still worked out long after my final bell had rung.. Just not as hard as I once did.
I would need to use this window of time to secure a safe place for myself. Gather supplies, secure my home, and establish communication with whomever was still out there would be key. I could live off the land if need be. Driving my truck into a hidden area of my yard, I head into my home to begin the next step towards my survival. I should be scared out of my wits.. But I am not. I haven’t lived this long to just throw in the towel now. Chaos was my specialty. Speaking of chaos… I wonder if Jack Bull fared just as well.
Quickly, the process begins. Clothes, my hammer, and the bare necessities are tossed into my truck. Most important of all, I snag a few rolls of toilet paper. I am far too old for shit stains..