Post by Diabolik on Aug 3, 2009 6:04:15 GMT -5
Wake up, Diabolik-san! Wake up! WAKE UP NOW!
It had always been tough for Urahara to wake me up, and today was no different. My sleep was never so easily disturbed by a man shouting in my face. But this time he did something different. He punched me.
The blow landed right on my nose, startling me awake.
WHAT THE FUCK?
I am sorry, Diabolik-san, but you must see this...
See what? I'm telling ya, if this isn't the goddamn apocalypse or something, i'm kicking your arse out the door...
You'll regret you wished that...
Whatever...
I spent a minute or so pulling my head together, shaking off the remains of the sleep, when I noticed the time.
Hey! It's only 9 O fucking clock! I'm never awake now!
This is important, hurry. NOW!
It was only then that I noticed he had his katana in his hand. A true Japanese katana, with blood on it.
Aw come on, you're saying you've done a fucking assassin job or something?
I stand up, finally getting off the bed. My boxer shorts clinging after a bad sleep. I could've sworn I heard some sort of moaning... I just assumed it was the people next door going at it again, but nothing quite prepared me for what I saw next.
I looked out of the window and saw them. I didn't want to believe it at first, they shouldn't exist, but there they were. Zombies, slouching and moaning through the streets. Some of them naked, some of them in hospital gowns, some of them fully clothed, but every single one of them shared the traits of a zombie.
WHAT THE FUCK?
I told you it was important...
In his other hand, he holds out my mobile phone. On the display screen, a single message showed up. It was from Warrior.
get 2 the suicide zone now! its our only defence!
I guess this means we're going to the Suicide Zone?
Safety in numbers.
True, but-
We have no time. Get dressed, grab a weapon, and come with me. I will drive.
Right...
I quickly pull on some pants and a t-shirt, and slip on some boots. I was quite grateful for Urahara's connections, because I saw he had a katana and a pistol waiting for me. A Beretta 92, and also a rifle, a Winchester 9422. Urahara had the same.
What's with the shitty single shot rifle?
You need to make every shot count...
Right... Who are you, Max Brooks?
No, but I studied his books... Just in case.
That's just embarrassing...
You may be grateful I broke one of his rules though.
Oh yeah?
I got us an armoured car.
Holy shit, now that's good...
We walk downstairs, keeping an eye on the windows and doors. There is a door through the hitchen into the garage, so we don't even have to go outside, and the garage door is remote controlled. No risk, which is good... We climb into the car, and Urahara presses the button for the garage door, and nothing happens.
Kuso! *Shit!*
What?
The door isn't working... One of us will have to do it by hand.
Fuck...
I say you should do it.
Fuck you, you do it!
You do it!
You do it!
Wait a minute... We're in an armoured car... We could just drive through it!
You're going to wreck my house?
Would you rather go out there and open the door?
Good point. Do it.
Urahara drives the vehicle straight through the garage door, causing a huge screech of metal as we tear through it. So far, we've only damaged the paintwork on the car. A zombie grasps onto the front of the car, gnashing at the glass on the windshield.
Hold the wheel for a moment.
What are you doing?
I grab onto the wheel and Urahara lets go. There are hardly any zombies around, so he leans out of the window and points his pistol at the zombie's head.
Shinezu buso kuso... *Die you ugly shit*
He pulls the trigger. Brain matter covers the windshield as Urahara sits back down and takes the wheel. He winds up the window and calmly switches on the wipers. It's as though he's done something like this before.
We're having fun now, huh?
I open the window on my side, lean out, and throw up.
*Japanese translations taken from here*
It had always been tough for Urahara to wake me up, and today was no different. My sleep was never so easily disturbed by a man shouting in my face. But this time he did something different. He punched me.
The blow landed right on my nose, startling me awake.
WHAT THE FUCK?
I am sorry, Diabolik-san, but you must see this...
See what? I'm telling ya, if this isn't the goddamn apocalypse or something, i'm kicking your arse out the door...
You'll regret you wished that...
Whatever...
I spent a minute or so pulling my head together, shaking off the remains of the sleep, when I noticed the time.
Hey! It's only 9 O fucking clock! I'm never awake now!
This is important, hurry. NOW!
It was only then that I noticed he had his katana in his hand. A true Japanese katana, with blood on it.
Aw come on, you're saying you've done a fucking assassin job or something?
I stand up, finally getting off the bed. My boxer shorts clinging after a bad sleep. I could've sworn I heard some sort of moaning... I just assumed it was the people next door going at it again, but nothing quite prepared me for what I saw next.
I looked out of the window and saw them. I didn't want to believe it at first, they shouldn't exist, but there they were. Zombies, slouching and moaning through the streets. Some of them naked, some of them in hospital gowns, some of them fully clothed, but every single one of them shared the traits of a zombie.
WHAT THE FUCK?
I told you it was important...
In his other hand, he holds out my mobile phone. On the display screen, a single message showed up. It was from Warrior.
get 2 the suicide zone now! its our only defence!
I guess this means we're going to the Suicide Zone?
Safety in numbers.
True, but-
We have no time. Get dressed, grab a weapon, and come with me. I will drive.
Right...
I quickly pull on some pants and a t-shirt, and slip on some boots. I was quite grateful for Urahara's connections, because I saw he had a katana and a pistol waiting for me. A Beretta 92, and also a rifle, a Winchester 9422. Urahara had the same.
What's with the shitty single shot rifle?
You need to make every shot count...
Right... Who are you, Max Brooks?
No, but I studied his books... Just in case.
That's just embarrassing...
You may be grateful I broke one of his rules though.
Oh yeah?
I got us an armoured car.
Holy shit, now that's good...
We walk downstairs, keeping an eye on the windows and doors. There is a door through the hitchen into the garage, so we don't even have to go outside, and the garage door is remote controlled. No risk, which is good... We climb into the car, and Urahara presses the button for the garage door, and nothing happens.
Kuso! *Shit!*
What?
The door isn't working... One of us will have to do it by hand.
Fuck...
I say you should do it.
Fuck you, you do it!
You do it!
You do it!
Wait a minute... We're in an armoured car... We could just drive through it!
You're going to wreck my house?
Would you rather go out there and open the door?
Good point. Do it.
Urahara drives the vehicle straight through the garage door, causing a huge screech of metal as we tear through it. So far, we've only damaged the paintwork on the car. A zombie grasps onto the front of the car, gnashing at the glass on the windshield.
Hold the wheel for a moment.
What are you doing?
I grab onto the wheel and Urahara lets go. There are hardly any zombies around, so he leans out of the window and points his pistol at the zombie's head.
Shinezu buso kuso... *Die you ugly shit*
He pulls the trigger. Brain matter covers the windshield as Urahara sits back down and takes the wheel. He winds up the window and calmly switches on the wipers. It's as though he's done something like this before.
We're having fun now, huh?
I open the window on my side, lean out, and throw up.
*Japanese translations taken from here*