Post by Commissioner Warrior™ on Aug 19, 2008 22:34:59 GMT -5
Tuesday Night Identity Swap Switcheroo Extravaganza opens up with a video showing random and irrelevant clips of each man participating in a match tonight. After the short video, the feed cuts to the arena and pans out to see the non-existent crowd. Instead of the common packed arena, the seats all seem to be filled with 2D cardboard cutouts of people. Occasionally some are holding up pre-made general signs like “This Sign is Upside Down” or “Hi Mom” or a sign with an arrow pointing down that simply says “Dave” and several signs with arrows to the left or right that say “His Sign Sucks!”.
LL: Hello everyone and welcome to the first ever TNISSE!
Jerry: Did you just say tennis?
LL: No, Tennesee.
Jerry: Oh, I guess that makes sense.
LL: Well regardless of my odd pronunciation, it’s time to get the action under way!
Juan Jalt: Ladies and gentlemen, it is now time for our opening contest! ¡Señoras y señores, esto es ahora el tiempo para nuestra competición de apertura! Introducing first, Hi Octane! ¡La introducción primero, Hola Octano!
Learn the Hard Way by Nickelback blares throughout the arena as flames erupt from the stage. Princess Firepower comes out, wearing a "Don't Fire Hi Octane" T-shirt, and holds up her arms. Hi Octane runs out and bounces up and down, before grabbing Princess Firepower's hand and running down to the ring, pulling her behind him. Hi Octane slides into the ring. Princess Firepower stands next to the ring clapping for Hi Octane.
Juan Jalt: And next, introducing his opponent...Diabolik! ¡Y después, introducción de su opositor...Diabolik!
All the lights go out, then Mr Writer starts up. Diabolik walks out slowly, and the lights go on red. The crowd boos, but Diabolik ignores them completely. He walks down the ramp, and reaches the ring. He lights go on to normal, and he hits his head off the ring a few times, before slowly climbing up onto the side of the ring and rolling in. He goes into a corner, and sits there, head in his hands, waiting for the match to begin.
The bell sounds and Hi Octane and Diabolik both quickly slide out of the ring. Diabolik wastes no time in going under the ring to grab a steel chair. While Hi Octane spends a few moments reaching into his tights...pulling out the Sock Full of Nickels! Both men slide in and go to hit the other with their weapon. Diabolik holds the chair up and goes to swing, but Octane slams the sock full of nickels into the chair causing both of them to drop the weapons from the impact. Both try to shake the shock off of their hands as Diabolik suddenly catches Octane with a standing dropkick that knocks him to the ground.
LL: What is it with him and that sock full of nickels?
Diabolik waits a moment for Octane to get to his feet, before pulling him into a small package for 1...2...but Octane kicks out of it. They both roll away and get to their feet. Diabolik then bolts towards Octane and leaps for a huge dropkick, but Octane ducks and pulls down the ropes as far as possible. Diabolik’s speed and height works against him as his body goes flying over the rope and lands ribs first on the outside of the ring.
Jerry: That was actually somewhat smart of Octane, ducking out of the way like that.
LL: Big surprise there.
Octane slides out of the ring and goes under the ring, pulling out a large table. Octane sets the table up outside of the ring and then goes to pick up Diabolik. Octane moves Diabolik near the table and is about to start putting him onto it, but Diabolik pushes him off and suddenly grabs Octane and nails an overhead belly to belly suplex which explodes out of nowhere. The move is perfectly positioned as Octane is sent right through the table he had just set up. Diabolik quickly covers Octane for 1...2...but Princess Firepower pulls Diabolik off of him.
Jerry: What is that little jezebel doing?
LL: Jezebel? That’s an interesting word. Jezebel.
Diabolik stands up and looks at Firepower, and she suddenly realizes what she’s done. Diabolik suddenly begins to chase Princess Firepower around the ring. By the time they circle around a full time, Octane is still down but she manages to leap over him and the table like an olympic hurdle. Diabolik is a little behind, and Octane has sat up by the time Diabolik gets around to him. So Diabolik decides to end the chase and leaps, dropkicking Hi Octane right in the back.
Jerry: What a move. Talk about sudden impact!
LL: Why? I didn’t actually enjoy that movie to be honest.
Diabolik goes under the ring and pulls out another steel chair, setting it up not far from him. He then picks up Octane and is about to ddt him onto it face first for the ‘So Long, Teeth!’, but Octane struggles out of it. Octane backs away from him and hits a standing side kick knocking Diabolik to the ground. Octane sees a chance to finish the match as he pulls out another table now, setting it up by Diabolik and lifting him up and onto it. Octane then pulls out a large steel ladder, climbing to the top and suddenly jumping for the Hi Dive!
Jerry: Octane taking a risk now!
Octane leaps off for an huge frog splash of his own design, but Diabolik rolls out of the way and Octane crashes through the table. Diabolik sees an interesting opportunity, as he pulls out another ladder and leans it against the first ladder. Diabolik waits a moment for Octane to stir, suddenly running up the ladder and leaping off of it, catching Octane in a very unique version of the Springboard Stunner! Diabolik covers Octane now for 1...2...3!
Juan Jalt: And here is your winner by pinfall...Diabolik! Y aquí está su ganador por pinfall... ¡Diabolik!
LL: That match was just insane. From tables to ladder to chairs...wait. That reminds me of somethi- I lost it.
Jerry: Nice job dumbass.
LL: Thanks! Now it’s time for our Main Event! A Triple Threat Steel Cage Match!
Jerry: This is going to be...cuhrazee!
Juan Jalt: Ladies and gentlemen, it is know time for your Main Event! And this match will be a Steel Cage Match allowing pinfalls and submissions! Introducing first...he is the current EUW World Heavyweight Champion...Tom "The Eh" Roberts! ¡Señoras y señores, es saben el tiempo para su Acontecimiento Principal! ¡Y este partido será un Partido de Jaula de Acero que permite pinfalls y sumisiones! Introduciendo primero ... él es el Campeón de Peso pesado Mundial EUW corriente... ¡Tom "Eh" Roberts!
At the start of Beautiful Mourning, the lights of the arena circle and flash reds, the arena cast in to near darkness at the fade of each flash. The camera turns to point towards the entrance gate, and makes it there in time to catch a fountain of sparks that shoots up from the gate at the signal of the first words of the song. The song continues with heavy drumming, although the strumming has slowed, and Tom makes his way down the ramp, adjusting his elbow pads and looking about the ring. The shouted vocals continue as Tom ventures to the ring.
He stops at ringside and glances about, as the lyrics calm a bit. During this calm, Tom makes his way in to the ring by hopping up to the apron and then climbing in under the bottom rope. Once in the ring, he smirks and turns towards the ramp, awaiting his opponent as the vocals for the song turn back to vicious yells.
Juan Jalt: And his opponents, first....Chris Sabora! Y sus opositores, primero.... ¡Chris Sabora!
Chris walks out onto the stage to a huge pop from the fans. With both hands on his hips, he looks around the arena and smiles. Making his way to the ramp entrance, Chris points both hands up in the air as fireworks explode. "Kryptonite" by 3 Doors Down pounds the audio as Chris Makes his way to the ring. Rolling under the ropes, Chris bounces around and checks the tape on his hands.
Juan Jalt: And lastly, the final entrant in this match up. He is....Ryan Firestone! Y finalmente, el principiante final en este partido. Él es.... ¡Ryan Firestone!
Now that everyone has entered the ring, including the referee, the steel cage is slowly lowered to the ring. The bell finally sounds and Ryan Firestone and Chris Sabora waste no time in bolting towards each other. Neither man seems to want to wait to get their hands on the other. Firestone manages to get off the first move, elbowing Sabora in the side of the head and landing a Northern Lights Suplex. Firestone raises his hands in the air, but Tom suddenly runs up behind him, grabbing him for an overhead belly to back suplex. Tom explodes with the move and uses so much force and power with it that Firestone ends up flipping over and slamming chest first into the steel cage before turning and collapsing to the ground on his side.
LL: What in the hell!? He just threw Firestone like he was nothing!
Jerry: El throweh Fuegostone liko notineh!
LL: What was that?
Jerry: Like my Spanish?
Tom looks around the ring and sees both men down, suddenly bolting towards the cage door. Tom goes to push it open but the door is still locked. He begins yelling at one of the referees to open it up. The referee struggles with the lock, finally getting the chain off and beginning to open the door when Sabora goes up behind Tom and rolls him up. The referee slides in quickly and counts 1...2...but Tom powers out of it. Tom gets to his feet just as Sabora does and the two lock up not far from the cage door. Sabora tries hook him into the Sabora-Plex, but Tom suddenly catches Sabora with an exploder suplex.
LL: He’s just catching people with suplexes left and right.
Tom goes to exit through the door again, but Firestone grabs him as he is on his way out and hits a huge german suplex onto the current EUW World Champion. Firestone goes to exit the cage quickly, not wasting any time at all. He gets through the ropes when he feels someone grab at his feet. Chris Sabora has a grasp on his ankle, suddenly pulling on it and causing Firestone to crumble. Firestone falls awkwardly though, hitting his head on the steel steps by the door. Sabora drags Firestone closer to the center of the ring, suddenly lifting him off the ground and hitting the Sabora-Plex.
Jerry: There’s the Sabora-Plex, this one is over.
Sabora hooks the leg of Firestone for 1...2...but Tom suddenly breaks up the pin. Tom backs away from Sabora, waiting for him to get to his feet. Tom runs up at him, kneeing him in the mid-section. Without any pause, Tom suddenly lands the Eh-Vengeance and links it to the Eh-Xit Wound. Sabora looks like he’s about to tap, but Firestone rolls near them and grabs Sabora’s free hand stopping him from being able to submit. Firestone holds him in place, allowing Tom to deal significant damage before knocking both of them out of the hold.
LL: That looked like torture!
Jerry: Torturo hurto! Was that good?
LL: Well besides the fact that the first thing you said sounded like Tour Churro, sure.
Tom rolls out of the submission as Firestone goes after him. Firestone moves in and the top lock up, Firestone gets him in a headlock and the two move closer to the side of the cage. Firestone suddenly throws Tom head first into the cage. Tom hits the cage and bounces off, landing back first on the ground and grasping his face. Firestone sees a chance to escape, going to the cell door and almost making it out. Tom grabs him just as he gets through the ropes though. Tom wraps his arms around Firestone from behind, and does the only move he sees possible. Another huge overhead belly to back suplex that sends Firestone from the outside of the cage on the steps over his head and back into the ring, turning Firestone completely inside out.
Jerry: The pure ability our champion never ceases to amaze me!
Firestone hits the mat inside in the ring, and Sabora is finally getting back up now. With an opportunity right in front of him, Sabora grabs Firestone’s arm and locks him into The Machine. Firestone lifts his arm into the air and is about to tap. While all this is going on though, Tom has made his way out through the door, and hops down to the floor just before Firestone begins to tap out.
Juan Jalt: And here is your winner by escape...the EUW World Heavyweight Champion....Tom "The Eh" Roberts! Y aquí está su ganador por fuga ... el Campeón de Peso pesado Mundial EUW.... ¡Tom "Eh" Roberts!
Tuesday Night Identity Swap Switcheroo Extravaganza fades out as Tom celebrates outside of the ring and Firestone and Sabora continue to brawl inside the cage.
This has been an EUW Production...
Special Thanks to...
Oblivion/Xplode for coming up with the idea
Everyone who participated and roleplayed
Me for writing this entire show over the past few hours. ;D
